Paradox

I don't know why I am restless,
like I want something ,
like something is missing from me ,


I feel so lost though I am surrounded
I feel detached though I am not,
I want to let my tear fall down
but pushing hard to hold down too.

I want to scream out loud ,
yet end up locking the whisper,
I want to flood,
yet I am holding even a drop.

I know ,I can see
yet I am confused,lost in a chaos.
I understand ,I can feel
yet I misunderstand and dont feel any.

I believe ,I trust
yet I doubt ,I am insecure
I know what it is,yet I don't know what it is
I am registering myself in the collection of paradox .